Say Yes to Everything.

Recently I have been trying a new approach:

I say Yes to everything that makes me feel slightly fearful or nervous.

When my wife asked me if I wanted to quit my job and move to Lisbon, I said “Yes”.

When I was offered the opportunity to be a host at the Impact Hub in Lisbon, I said “Yes”.

Then they asked me to teach yoga there and I said “Yes”.

Then they asked me to do a skill share about life coaching concepts. I said “Yes”.

Next I was asked to substitute teach at a yoga studio. I said “Yes”.

Would any of these decisions lead to something? When I initially took these actions, I had no idea. But I believe this is how the universe works. When you set a strong intention or desire out into the world, circumstances, people and events will manifest in your life.

You can think of this as a type of feedback mechanism.

Your intention and your attitude is transmitted out, and opportunities come back in which match that intention. You only need to cultivate the presence and awareness to understand them for what they are, and act on them.

When you act on them, your individual actions will seem disparate and unconnected. But they actually are connected somehow. One thing needs to happen before another thing can happen. You need to do a thing that puts you in touch with a person that leads to the next thing.

Usually, as Steve Jobs put it, you can only connect the dots of causality going backwards. If you can cultivate the feeling that you are living this unfolding process with each of the little individuals actions you take, then life becomes magical.

But surely you can’t say Yes to everything. This contradicts your advice about saying No to things. I’m confused.

This is true. There will be times when you should not say Yes.

Be very attentive to your emotions.

When the opportunity is presented, does it excite or scare you?

If so, you should probably say Yes.

But when an opportunity makes you feel bad – for instance, your boss “invites” you to work late when you already have plans with your loved ones that evening – then maybe you should say No.

Your decision should depend on whether you are saying Yes to your own desires, or to the desires of others.

If you say Yes too often to the desires of others while subordinating your own needs and desires, you will quickly become a doormat.

If you don’t respect your own needs, others won’t respect them either.

Your emotions will tell you which one it is.

In summary:

If the opportunity makes you excited or a little afraid, say Yes.

If it makes you frustrated or angry, say No.

Follow that simple heuristic for 90 days and see where it takes you.

Post-Script Update: Since saying Yes to the above things, I landed 3 new private coaching clients, and was offered to run the entire yoga studio for 2 months.

Tell me where saying Yes has gotten you!